Riding 3 Days in a Row

This will be a recent first for me. Yes, I can ride 3 days in a row, but the question is how well?? Yesterday I went out in the afternoon for a ride on a whim and the weather was just perfect. However when I got home, whew, I was toasted.

This morning after a good night sleep I’m feeling up to it, but there is an underlying level of exhaustion.   At least the vacuuming got done yesterday, so I’m left with just errands today.

Off I go…

Beginning of a Transformation

This weekend my husband and I went to a book festival. Earlier this year he self published an important book about how critical your thoughts are to your everyday life. It is based on some powerful experiences we’ve had the last several years.  See link for more info.

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The visit to the book festival was to begin to understand what happens in the writing, publishing and book world. It felt similar to trying to understand the startup world 14 years ago when we decided to start a company. I’ve lived by the concept, “when in Rome, do as the Romans do” to jump in and experience the world as others do.

Sometimes I do a better job than others, but I’ve gained so much from an experience perspective, that I hope to be a better citizen of the world. This cancer blog was one of those experiences.

‘What? Write about something as personal as cancer and put down what you really think and publish it on social media for everyone to read? Possibly be heckled and trolled by someone behind a computer screen? What? Have you lost your modesty and perspective, Beth??’

Well, I have gained so much from everyone, so it would have been my loss to not have engaged as I did.

This new journey seems a bit tame compared to the startup journey, but then I am a bit older and very much wiser!!

All Cleaned Up

Well, this week I feel like my body has been cleaned up and cleaned out.

Yesterday I went to get my teeth cleaned.   Good news, no cavities.   It occurred to me as I was talking to the dental hygienist that between the colonoscopy and the teeth cleaning this week, I’m pretty cleaned up, both inside and out.

I’m sure you’re thinking ‘O Brothers’, but from my perspective it feels great.

Hah.

Enjoy your first summer weekend!!!

How Different

Yesterday I had my colonoscopy.   Contrary to what I thought I remembered, I was supposed to have one in five years. Right now. The coincidence with cancer was just my imagination…unrelated apparently per the doctor.

Well, that’s a relief of some kind, but the interesting part for me was the comparison of the experiences of going in for surgery earlier this year and a procedure I had already had.

I noticed I was more in ‘observation mode’ than ‘get info’ mode. I found myself talking with the nurses about my procedure earlier this year and wondering if there was anything related between the two. No, there wasn’t in terms of my health, but I also knew when everything was over in a couple hours, I would be back home in my cancer wear. Those black pants and tee shirts that were washed twice a week, because I didn’t have anything else I could wear.

What was I so concerned about? The prep work? For sure. In that case, surgery was way easier. Not so much the head games you can play, though. Particularly the sign I saw on the wall, Surgical Oncology, as I walked the halls of the hospital after surgery.

Today I’m back on the bike for a short ride again today. I need some sunshine.

Colonoscopy

Yes, today is the day of ‘cleansing’ or whatever you call no eating of solid food. This colonoscopy is, I suspect, a direct result of the cancer. Since the cancer was in the same region as the colon, I’m sure they decided it was time to do one of these again, UGH.

I had one several years ago and everything was good. I didn’t need to have one for 10 years. Mind you, I knew exactly when I would have to get another one and it wasn’t THIS soon.

Now, out of the other side of my head, I’m thinking, ‘you’re lucky the cancer was caught early and this is just a follow up to make sure there isn’t something else to catch early as well.’ Somehow I’m sure the end justifies the means, but my stomach will consider it irrelevant very shortly.

I’ve already put my husband on notice that I’m probably not going to be the best company for the next 24 hours. He promptly noted that he would find something else to do elsewhere. Good for both of us. Told him to take the dog too. No reason to subject him to my frustrations…

I’m still going for a ride this morning. No reason not to wear myself out. I’ll just be drinking lot of fluids and parking myself next to the bathroom for the next day anyway. Maybe I’ll be slimmer and trimmer…@#%^$&?

 

 

Tired

Not sure why I’m so tired today. Did my weekly shot last night for MS. It can leave me a bit off the next day, but I think the tiredness is a reflection of the changes going on in my life right now. All good, but overwhelming nonetheless.

Building a new house (been on the back burner for 12+ years), beginning workshops with my husband for a book he self published about lessons we’ve learned, painfully at times about life, departing family (always a bummer) and no sun today. Jeez, it’s the start of the Memorial Day Weekend!

Need to reboot! Have a good weekend everyone.

Regular Ride

Today I’ll be going on a regular ride vs. the longer one I did last Thursday. You see, the body takes longer to recuperate these days. While I feel great, I know once I get on the bike and start riding up steeper hills, I’ll feel it. No matter. Maybe next week.

June Gloom is starting early this year it seems. Until I lived in southern California, I had never heard the term ‘June Gloom.’ Basically the hot inland area draws the fog in from the ocean and we have fog (like can’t see more than a couple feet in front of you at times fog) throughout the month of June. Everywhere else I’ve lived, June was the first real month of summer. Not here. We bundle up until July.

Ha, so much for summer…..

Fog

Today I was able to get out a bit earlier for my walk with the dog and the silence was astounding.

The fog creates a nice blanket over the Bay Area when it moves in and it just sits on any sound. Trucks and cars are quieter, the air is still and any other noise has a quiet quality to it. You can still hear sounds, but it’s quiet, almost calm.

There were birds occasionally singing, but it was a very muted sound. It was almost like a salve on a painful sore. Sometimes silence or quietness is very much a balm for the business of daily life, but you can only benefit from it in a quiet state.

My cancer diagnosis and the resulting time to heal has reinforced the importance of quietness. Perhaps it’s one of the things you can only learn after living life.

Recuperation Ride

Well, the ride last Thursday over hill and vale has stayed with me for several days. Sunday I took my regular route to see how things were doing, aka how tired and sore am I still? Well, I was pretty tired, especially my legs.

Today I’ll take another ride, but it will be more of a recovery ride. I’m tentatively planning to do the same ride again this Thursday, so how I feel today will be a good indicator of how quickly I’m recovering. This is all part of understanding how good my conditioning is after the cancer surgery.

 

Rush Monday

Today is the first of the week and everything seems to be loaded up front for the week. Yes, I could have adjusted it, but we have family in town and it seems to be working just fine as I write this huffing and puffing to get it all done before a mid morning meeting. Of course, the meeting will last all day, so no putting off what I can get done right now!!

Have a great Monday!